A thousand tiny cuts
What it took to live
In these shoes
Shaking in my skin
Fear always seemed to be
All there ever was
In a place like this
A place that doesn’t care
Trapped inside your own mind
Screaming to make it go away
Scream louder it’s all the same
Wanted so much more
Wanted anything else and now
I want nothing at all
A thousand tiny paper cuts
Against my hands
Against my skin
Searching for meaning
Where meaning never existed

Thought maybe this emptiness would fade away…

Told myself it was…
Lied to my own reflection
About how this all must be
Take it all back
Every last cent… every drop of sweat…
Wasn’t worth a second of my time
Wasn’t worth the time I’ll never get back
So, fuck it and take it all
Every drop of blood that
Splashes against the floor
Next to every drop of sweat
How much more do you need
To prove this all wrong?
How much more will it take
Until you are done with me?
What am I worth when I am nothing?

The lost diary of someone who is never coming back…

Doesn’t feel the same as it used to
Time takes its toll on a life left to live
Didn’t know this feeling would follow me
Time has taken all that it needed
If I could have wanted more
I’m not sure it would have mattered
Life doesn’t care about what we want
Doesn’t care about what we need
Life will always take everything
Didn’t know this feeling would follow me
To a grave built over time
To a place I have always known
Doesn’t feel the same as it did before
Time takes its toll on a life left to live
Didn’t know this feeling would follow me
Through until the end… through it all…
Should have known this feeling was born in me

Nothing new to report… just a man… lost in his own thoughts… nothing special resting behind these eyes… just another day… of trying to try… the effort it takes to breath… to do anything… it attaches itself to everything that needs to be done… not worth the effort… if you ask me… not worth the time it takes… to fail any way… the feelings will pass… the problem will always be the same… at least there’s always tomorrow…