Waiting For Everything In Reverse…

In Reverse Things Seem Strange

I feel sick today but not insane
My convictions are stronger than my will
Makes sense if you could be me for a moment
You’d understand then of course
Probably not but that’s okay
No one knows what it’s like to be anything
Too much confusion in the giant fish bowl
We are all pets, barely house broken
We label ourselves man but animal is much more fitting
Examine each thought as though it means something
Sometimes I like to say stupid shit
Without meaning or verbs
I prefer nothing over some things
But sometimes nothing is never enough
Wish I knew when enough was enough
What it meant to mean to be human
And I could walk away
We all have our cross to bare
But I feel mine is an absolute
A never ending revelation in my mind
Crucify me, nothing else to do tonight
I can’t stop you from doing what you are willing to do
Think in so many ways I might be ready
The pain might refresh my thoughts
Reprise, I feel sick today but not insane

 

Glass Eyes and Blood Red Tears…

My mind seems to never go away
Shut the fuck up doesn’t work internally
The silence slices like a gun
Penetrating me form within
Really just isn’t that much fun
One life to live as it rots away
Who knows how much longer
This will last before I know who I am

“Describe The Ideal Life”….
One where I am not me…. 

I hate myself more than you
Why is it that you are always better?
Because I hate myself more than you
How is it that you can get more done?
Because I hate myself more than you
Who else is as fast as you?
No one which is why
I hate myself more than you

“If You Could Live Anyplace In The World – Where Would It Be?”
Japan… South Africa… Maine… as far away from me as possible…

The world is fated to go up against me
A singular perspective of rape and religion
Words confused but often mean the same
Forever damned without a reason as to when
I’ve given up before, ready to do it again
Another year and I’ll see where I am at
Treading water or wishing I was dead
Give me what you want the world stops for no man

“What Do You Think It’s Like After You Die?”
A whole lot like this… smiling and waiting for it to happen again…. 

Slipping into a new skin made of barbed wire and sin
If I had known anything would’ve stayed naked and bare
Sliding through nature as though I know
If I knew anything at all
I’d be long gone by now

Broken Thoughts

I don’t like this format at all… trying something different… and it makes my skin itch down to the bone… rather be chewing on some glass… if you know what I mean… little shards digging their way in… what’s the difference if it only hurts in the end?… running from a predetermined conclusion… if that isn’t a funeral… than I am unsure what it is… I am supposed to be doing here… six feet deep… and only inches from hell…